Okay, Okay, I watch the X-factor. Don’t hate me for it. Mind you, sometimes I hate myself for it. This week for example. I hated myself for watching it this week.
Why? Well, it was 80s night, and boy did it make me feel old.
This was partly because most of the contestants were singing songs much older then they were, but also because I found myself shouting at the TV a lot.
“NO, no, no, NO! That’s all wrong.”
“That’s not a fucking ballad!”
“Shit, I love this song, and they’ve murdered it!”
“That’s not even an 80s track FFS!”
Were just some of the more printable things I yelled during the two and a half hour torture on Saturday night.
Still, at least we got a laugh out of it when Simon spent most of the night calling Cheryl Tweedy-Cole-Fernandez-Versini “Kermit” due to her God Awful green dress.
“It’s Lanvin!” she screeched the first time he mentioned the dress. I’m sure that’s supposed to mean something, but for the life I me I’ve no idea what.
p.s. her name is getting so long now it’ll soon take up a whole tweet on it’s own – Cheryl-Kermit Tweedy-Cole-Fernandez-Versini. It’s quite a mouthful.